An Excerpt from the Diary of Hermione Anne Granger
by LadyBrannon
Summary: ~Complete~ Hermione shares her seduction of Snape through her journal.
1. Introduction to Hermione's Diary

The Diary of Hermione Anne Granger

June 28, 1997

To my Beloved Daughter on her graduation from Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, you have made me proud beyond my dreams.

Love Always, Mom 

June 29, 1997

My mother gave me this journal to record my thoughts and actions over the next few years. She says that the college years are the most influential years of your life and you will want to remember them always. If she only knew the trial and tribulations that Ron, Harry and I have experienced in our years here at Hogwarts, she would probably take me home and never let me leave. And, her hair would be much whiter than it is. *grin*

-------Insert a lot of learning and living here-------


	2. July 17, 2000

July 17&18, 2000

It was a stormy night, a cold, stormy night. I found myself shivering in the wind and rain. Most people would have gone inside like the muggle cliché, but neither was I a muggle anymore; nor trying to prove my intelligence. I was, after all, the smartest witch or wizard to graduate Hogwarts in 500 years. 

Not, that that was helping me with my current dilemma, mind you. Oh no, I was certainly not looking through books or using my cleverness to solve this problem. I was using raw sex appeal, the basic of desires. I was turning myself into a forbidden fruit, if you will, for one Potions Master. Once I set my mind on something, I make it mine. Severus Snape was targeted and he was about to find himself in my crosshairs. 

So, here I am, in the rain, preparing myself for the game that begins tomorrow by partaking in a mental catharsis, to make sure my thoughts were focused and decisive.

I closed my eyes and turned my head to the heavens for one last cleansing breath and to enjoy the peaceful moment marked by the gentle pattering of water on my face. After a moment or two, I turned and headed back into the Leaky Cauldron. Tomorrow, I would be home for the first time in three long years. 

I woke the following morning to the warm light of day. My room was cast with a poignant golden hue that harshly called me from my slumber. I was a quick riser, no loitering in bed, especially today. It was time to implement phase one and it was going to take every moment I had until I was to arrive at Hogwarts during the noon hour. 

I quickly grabbed a new outfit from my new wardrobe; or as I had been calling it, the instigator. 

Essential rules of psychology, in college, had taught me that to win the war you need the upper hand. Apply this to the male psyche, and it means knock them for a loop at first sight and the war is half over. So, my first battle will be a battle of vision; that hopefully, will be followed either by a battle of wits or sex. Either way, I am sure to be enticed. 

I completed my female rituals by applying my lipstick, a quick blot of the lips and I am off. 

I apparate to the outer gates of Hogwarts and walk the familiar path to the main entrance. 

It is mid-July so no students are around, but teachers are arriving to begin their preparations for the September first start date.

The large, oak doors open as I walk up the entrance stairs and I once again find myself immersed in the castle with its terrific magical aura. 

I hear my name and I turn to find several of my former Professors approaching in obvious greeting. Professors Dumbledore, McGonagall, Flitwick and Hagrid were asking how I had been and was I happy to be back. I assured them I was while slyly looking for the object of my desire. As I expected, he was nowhere to be seen. I like it when I know my prey and its habits. His not being there was a confirmation of my knowledge and my game plan; I consciously found myself standing taller and prouder. Dumbledore offered his arm with a great flourish, and escorted me into the Great Hall. As we approached the Head Table, Dumbledore covertly leaned closer to my left ear and informed me that I might want to sit to my right, Severus is notoriously habitual. 

I don't know why, I really don't, but I found myself simply responding with a startled gaze at the Headmaster. He took a second to wink in jest at my surprise and eloquently placed me at the appropriate seat to be by Severus. I nodded my head in thanks and acknowledgement and began my wait. 

To my left was Professor Black, of course, he would always be Sirius to me. Dumbledore had hired him as soon as he was exonerated to be the DADA professor. 

Sirius nodded in acknowledgement and I soon found myself in a roaring conversation about Harry and Ron's latest antics for the Ministry of Magic. 

I have to admit, at one time, I actually considered Sirius to be a potential prey. However, I soon assured myself that while he is extremely appealing on the physical level (what woman wouldn't go for a 6'2" dark-haired Greek god?); he was not my equal in the intellect department. 

Now, please don't think I am an intellectual snob, far from it. But, to tie myself to one like Sirius Black would be akin to shacking up with Harry or Ron. My life would have revolved around dangerous endeavors to prove one's bravery without the foresight to think of a plan followed by a regaling discussion of quidditch and its illogical rules. How would I stifle all those yawns? 

No, I needed a man that would challenge me, make me think and stimulate me on every level. The only man to succeed, thus far, I now called "my prey."

As I finished my internal pondering, I noticed a movement out of the corner of my eye. Yes, it was him. The man, who was going to make me come alive in so many ways, was finally within my grasp. I took one more relaxing deep breath and I turned as he pulled out his chair. 

"Hello Severus" I calmly purred.

Upon hearing his name, he glanced in my direction. He raised an elegantly arched eyebrow and sneered, "Back so soon Miss Granger? Real world too hard for you?"

"No," I gleefully informed him. "I was so successful they let me out a whole year early!"

He snorted elegantly. In case you have not noticed, I find a lot of what the man does incredible classy and graceful, even his sneers and snorts. 

So, there I sat during the entire dinner, pretending to listen to Sirius, but actually keeping tabs on Severus out of the corner of my right eye.

It was everything I expected and more. I knew him to have long, graceful movements that were efficiently executed. But to see the movements up close was as poetic as Shakespeare's finest sonnets. I felt the desire to reach out and touch him, but I stymied myself with thoughts of the plan. It was too early for touch. Remember, the first battle is that of vision. 

While I made no outward advances during the beginning courses of dinner, I could no longer contain myself when the dessert arrived. It was simply too perfect.

There in front of me was a Twinkie. I know you think I'm joking, don't you? My only response to that is that Albus Dumbledore IS the Headmaster of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Ahhh, I see you remember now! Good. So, you see, I could not allow this superb opportunity to pass. Yes, you know what is coming; down to the creamy filling. I am somewhat ashamed to say that I was a bit more vigorous than I intended and caught the attention of more than "my prey." Many a male professor left the hall that night with an odd gait. I admit I also slightly betrayed myself by allowing my cheeks to be tinged with a hint of red. I really must research how one can control that particular human reaction. 

So now, after filling you in on the last two days, I am off to bed. All in all, I believe it to be two fairly successful days. Good Night.


	3. July 31, 2000

July 31, 2000

Greetings! It has been awhile since I have informed you of how my plan is progressing. I had told myself that I would withhold all entries until something of significance had occurred. So, guess why I am writing today? 

I touched him, on the thigh. I did it with confidence and just a hint of pressure. I wanted to make sure that he knew it was me. It occurred during a special dinner for Harry's Birthday. He also called me on it. Read on… 

Harry and Ron arrived two days ago to celebrate Harry's Birthday with me. We spent our first day in Hogsmeade. We caught up on recent events in our lives and I took a chance, a really big chance. I told them. Yes, you read that right. I went against every fiber of my being and I told them. 

There I was, sitting and drinking butterbeer, listening to Ron fill us in on his love life (quite the exuberant fellow I might add too); when Harry interjected a question about my lack of a love life. 

My first instinct was to pretend I had not heard, but it seemed that after the topic was broached; neither Harry nor Ron was willing to let it go.

So, I found myself explaining my plan in some detail as well as whom it was being utilized. 

At first, they were not too impressed. In fact, one might even say they suffered, momentarily, from shock. Instead of waiting for their ability to speak to return, I enthusiastically informed them of why I was convinced this was the perfect idea. 

It took a while and a lot of explaining, but I eventually got through to Harry. I don't think I'd say he is as ecstatic as I am, but he can accept that I believe this union will make me happy. Ron, well, I never really had any hope. At least I got him to stop calling him a "greasy git." Some semblance of progress, don't you think?

After the discussion, Ron returned to Hogwarts. He claimed he needed a nap, ate too much, but I'm not ignorant. He couldn't stomach what I was about to do next.

I figured since I was in Hogsmeade, I would go ahead and pick up the items I need for the execution of phase two. My next stop was---a visit to the lingerie store for the modern witch.

Wondering where Harry is? You got it in one! I talked him into joining me. Don't ask me how cause I can't tell. No, I mean I really don't know, I swear!

Regardless, he was a huge help. He gave me insight to the modern wizard.

I asked him questions about what he finds stimulating intellectually and physically. I am pleased to state that only a few revelations occurred. Once again, my understanding of the male psyche assured myself that I was on the right path to seduce my former Professor.

What did I add to my arsenal, you wonder? I purchased some very interesting items from the magical world of sexual enhancement (pun intended, of course) devices.

Item number one: A topical potion, when used on both lovers, creates a sensory bond. Thus, the bond allows each lover to feel their tactile sensations and the tactile sensations of their partner; sounds interesting not only from a purely educational perspective, but also from the baser, mind-blowing sexual perspective.

Item number two: An oldie but a goodie, is a mini bondage set made for the masochistic beginner complete with the ever important handcuffs. We don't want him getting away now do we?

Item number three: A potion, taken orally by women, that causes the female to experience weightlessness for more –umm- advanced sexual positions. This product is really quite fascinating as it works only for women due to the magical bonding of the potion, infused with a levitation charm, to high levels of Estrogen, but I digress.

I think the latter is the one I most look forward to using. I wonder if you agree.

Soon, Harry and I found ourselves back at our alma mater eating dinner at the Head Table. Although, Dumbledore had made a few changes to spice up the décor for Harry's birthday; several new additions included a round Head Table decorated with golden, lightening bolt-shaped confetti, an ice sculpture of a lightening bolt that randomly flashed much like the muggle strobe lights and the cake; one guess as to what it looked like. 

Harry helped me assure that I sat beside "my prey." Once again, Severus was on my right, but this night found Dumbledore on my left and proved to be the source of quite an interesting night. 

Dinner began with Severus arriving at the last moment as if he did not want our company any longer than he must. As he sat, I once again spoke my greeting and waited for his snide remark. He did not disappoint. 

Dumbledore engaged me in a conversation about my collegiate adventures and how I felt about what I had learned. I guess that I should make you aware that I graduated top of my class from the Magical Institute of Learning an entire year early. 

As I was speaking with Albus, Harry caught my eye and slightly nodded his head towards Severus. It seemed that Severus had ended his short, staccato diatribe with Sirius, thank the gods. Male pissing contests really do get old very quickly. 

Apparently Dumbledore (omniscient, as always) saw Harry's nod, and quickly ended our conversation with a wink. Blasted man, he always makes me doubt my understanding of the male psyche. I politely smile and wink back. Then, I turn towards my goal. 

Earlier, while dressing for dinner, I had had a mental conversation with myself; strongly reminding myself of my personal expectations to be Severus' new lover by September first. I spent about thirty minutes mentally psyching myself that I really needed to start making serious progress. 

So, now I find myself in the perfect situation to move from visual to tactile. I move.

I lightly place my hand on Severus' upper thigh, lean in close and ask politely (and with a touch of innocence, men LOVE that) for the salt.  Severus is immediately responsive to my touch. I feel him tense and become still. Then, he very mechanically and rigidly acquires the salt and places it to the right of my plate. I gently squeeze his thigh and relay my thanks. 

He stiltedly nodded in acknowledgement.

I felt, at this point, I needed to give him a moment to recover, so I turned towards Harry and Sirius and inquired about their plans post Harry's Birthday. They filled the necessary interim, so that I could continue my torture of one, Severus Snape. Why do I feel the need to tell you that I really want to cackle evilly? Oh well, no matter…

My next plan for the evening was to get him alone and spark his mind (shame on you, get your mind out of the proverbial gutter!). 

As soon as it was possible, I followed Severus out of the dining hall. He really is quite the speed walker and his gait is enormous. I found myself running to recover the lost distance. 

I called his name and saw him slightly falter in his purposeful stride, but he quickly recovered. He turned with his trademark flair sending his robes billowing in the most arousing way. Yes, I admit it. This man made me a nymphomaniac. I wanted him anywhere at anytime. Gods, I was so wet. And then, he spoke with that silky drawl that had my nerves responding as if I had been lightly caressed by his long elegant fingers. I really am beginning to think the man could make me orgasm just by speaking my name over and over; but, once again, I find myself digressing.

"Severus," I said, "I would like to invite you to my rooms on Friday night. I am having a poetry reading. I thought you might like to join."

If I didn't know better, I would have thought he was momentarily shocked, but it passed so quickly I knew I must have been mistaken. 

"Miss Granger, your attempts at seduction are really most obvious. Then again, Gryffindors are hardly known for their subtlety are they? Good night."

He turned and left. He had left me wanting more and he knew it! Bloody Hell, he had turned the blasted tables on me. 

So, here I am writing this down, suffering in my own conceived hell of wanting. I will prevail! I am not giving up. I'll just need to change my tactics; as they say, all is fair in love and war.


	4. August 2, 2000

August 2, 2000

When I last left you, Severus had topped me at my own game. Bloody Man!

I woke the next morning and made my way to breakfast. I utilized my inherent Gryffindor courage and made sure I arrived after he did. While he did not outwardly acknowledge my presence, I took great pride in noticing his eyes following me as I headed to my seat. When I walked around him, I obscurely took my right arm and drew it lightly across his back. 

He responded. I sat down with my normal confidant flair. As I pulled my chair closer to the table, he leaned toward me and whispered into my ear, "Your playing with fire, little girl."

I found myself smiling. I waited a few minutes and slightly leaned towards him. I secretly, under the table, placed my hands on his thigh and squeezed quite enthusiastically. To my immense delight, I felt his "interest" stirring against my fingers. 

I responded to his remark with one of my own, "Oh, I hope so!"

Then, after one last caress, I deftly removed my hand and finished my breakfast.

I spent my day preparing for my classes. I was truly in my element, and I find myself becoming happier every day. 

I met up with Severus at lunch and dinner, as well. Each time, I took great pleasure in making him distinctly aware of my presence. A light touch here, a whispered suggestion there or a poignant gaze and I began to find a sultry look in those dark, sexy eyes. 

To be honest, I didn't think I could be more aroused than I was on the night of Harry's Birthday, but I was so wrong. By the end of dinner that evening, I was ready to jump the man and make him mine.

So, I once again followed him out of the Great Hall that night and down to the dungeons. I caught up with him just outside his private chambers. 

I called out to him and saw him stop. He did not turn around, but I knew I had his attention from the stiffness in his form. I walked up to him and whispered that I wanted to fan his fire. 

He turned around, grabbed me by the shoulders and had me trapped against the wall all in one fluid motion. He ground himself against me, which pushed me further into the stone wall. I could not have cared less. I was experiencing nirvana. My entire body was surging with chemistry; the reactions occurring within my body were too many to count. I was a limp mass; the only thing keeping me upright was "my prey." 

Boy, looking back on what I just wrote; it is so obvious what is about to happen. Proceed I will, no matter what the cost to my esteem. The sagacious say to learn from your mistakes; and that, I will. That, I will. 

Severus caught my mouth in a harsh, demanding kiss. I succumbed immediately without any pretense. We both knew what I wanted. I wanted his tongue to invade my mouth and conquer it. I wanted him to be my Alexander the Great and make me his Persia. For several minutes, he dominated me with his mouth. His mouth then left mine and made a march for his next battle. He suckled and nipped his way down my neck and had me moaning a favorable battle cry. The battle cry was that of surrender in every way. I was his. He was my dictator, my mentor and my fearless warrior. I wanted to be ravaged. No, I needed to be ravaged. My breath was coming in short gasps. I was fighting for my breath. My body was on fire as he settled his mouth on my chest and took his tongue and licked the top of my robes. I found myself grasping a handful of his hair and pulling in my passionate ardour. This hint of pain only made him more intense and I felt the top of my robes become wet as he suckled, licked and probed the defined hem of the bosom of the robes. Both of my hands were in his hair now, kneading and grasping to pull him as close as possible to me.  Till now, his hands had been firmly clasped on my shoulders to keep me firmly against his hard, well-defined body and the wall; now, they were pushing me backwards. It seemed that Severus had quietly whispered the password to his private chambers during his torture of my body. 

With us now in the privacy of his chambers, I energetically pulled his outer robes from his person. Underneath, he wore a crisp crème shirt that was half-buttoned, so that I could see the beginnings of dark, curly hair. I gasped in carnal delight and immediately pulled one of my hands from his hair and fisted my hand in his shirt. I jerked with all my being and the shirt ripped. Buttons flew everywhere, but I did not care. All I wanted was to run my hands through the soft curls on his chest. It was at this time that I noticed Severus was no longer proactively making me melt. Instead, he was watching me with a frightful intensity that I felt all the way to my nether regions. I felt like I was the source for the Nile. His breath was coming in short, distinct gasps. He obviously was as aroused as I was. I could not stand there and just look anymore; I moved to close the space between us, but he held me at bay. 

After his breathing had returned to normal again, he tightened the hold on my arms and drew me closer in a menacing manner. 

"I told you, Little Girl, you were playing with fire. Payback is a bitch, eh?"

With that, he escorted me to his chamber's entrance. None to gently, he pushed me through the entrance and out into the dungeon's hallway. 

I cannot believe he has bested me again. This is quickly becoming more than a game. This is an obsession.

The next morning, I already had my next course of action in motion. I, once again, took me seat next to Severus and murmured my greeting. He sneered in response. To be honest, it actually made me feel better. I knew this Snape. I understood this Snape. 

As usual, the morning post came by owl during breakfast and so, too, came my next surprise for "the prey."

As expected, a school owl flew to Snape's plate and dropped an envelope in his plate. 

I saw him gingerly, some might even say hesitantly, pick it up. He turned it over and released a small puff of air in relief. It was very small and hardly noticeable, but I knew. 

He deftly broke through the school's crest and pulled out the contents of the envelope. He looked in fascination at the contents, the fascination turned into shock. He turned his head to me and stared at me in shock. I looked back at him intensely, never letting my gaze falter. He looked away first. He placed the item back in the envelope and left the Great Hall.

You see, after he threw me out of his rooms the night before, I went back to my room and made a special Wizard's photograph for his eyes only. 

As I walked back to my quarters, I came up with the idea of performing a striptease in pictures. Yep, that was my special little gift this morning, and judging from his reaction, I would sat I finally one upped Mr. Snape. It seems I was back on top. I intended to stay there. I also noticed; he took the letter with him. 


	5. August 4, 2000

August 4, 2000

Men and their pissing contests are the most annoying subjects on this planet; but, alas, I get far ahead of myself. Let me backtrack a good bit… 

After the incident with the Wizard's photo, it became very clear that I, too, had become an annoying obsession for my "prey." As you know from my earlier writings, I am in search of a man with good wits about him. Please do not think that I would be opposed to a good shag here and there either, but I need someone that I can mentally spar with AND keep me on my toes. Luckily, Severus just keeps proving himself more and more.

By lunch of the same day, he had his response to my striptease photo. It started off innocent enough. He gallantly took his seat by mine and sneered in my direction. I, of course, immediately responded with an overly sweet, "Hello again, Severus."

He took to eating and I took to watching him out of the corner of my eye. 

About five minutes later, the doors to the Great Hall opened and in walked a leprechaun. 

The leprechaun strode directly to the Head Table and bowed to us all. Seeing no outward reaction from Severus, I relaxed a little. Bad, Bad, Idea…Once again, I am getting ahead of myself.

The leprechaun started with a "Top 'O the Noon" and asked for a "Miss Hermione Granger." 

I muttered a quiet, "Oh Morgana the Sorceress help me now." under my breath.

Dumbledore was no help; he immediately chuckled and pointed an accusing finger at me. Blasted Man, if he was not my superior, I would add him to my list of annoyances. As it were, I had to sit and accept what was coming next.

The leprechaun appreciatively bowed to Dumbledore and walked to stand in front of me. He raised his top hat to me in greeting and introduced himself as Larry the Leprechaun. He then informed me that he was a courier and had a message for me. 

At that, the lights in the Great Hall magically dimmed and a spotlight fell on Larry. This was immediately followed by the sounds of "I Wanna Sex You Up."

As the pop tune strummed in the background, the leprechaun began gyrating his hips and unbuttoning his crisp white shirt. 

At this, feminine gasps could be heard from every corner of the Head Table(s). McGonagall, Hooch, Sprout…all of them, wore shocked expressions, but, I quickly surmised, were watching with intense interest. 

The leprechaun continued his movements despite the flutter of responses from the audience. By now, his shirt was completely undone and was hanging open in what should have been a very sexy way. Somehow, a leprechaun has a hard time pulling that look off; maybe that is why leprechauns are not featured heavily in muggle movies, no matter, my visit to Hades continued. 

He pulled the shirt off and threw it at Professor Hooch. The blasted woman giggled like a school girl. I was getting no "girl power" from my former women professors. Merlin's Beard, one walking into the situation, would have thought they had never received any attention from a man before. 

The leprechaun was now humping the bloody floor in what SHOULD have been an exciting manner; but once again, THIS IS A LEPRECHAUN.

He swayed his buttocks in my general direction and then flipped his pants off with a great flourish. Have you ever seen a leprechaun in a neon orange thong? Don't. 

Then, he turned around. Dear Merlin, the little man was hung like a HORSE! He continued his hip swaying; but now, it was marked by the bobbing of an appendage. 

While still holding his pants, he moved around the table (gyrating all the way with suggestive thrusts here and there) and stopped behind me. He wrapped the green pants around my neck and began shimming behind me. And yes, I could feel the damned tallywacker.

By now, all the female professors were clapping their hands in time with the music and cheering the small fellow on. Dumbledore and his male cohorts were trying, unsuccessfully I might add, to hide their inelegant sniggers. 

I was brought from my festered epiphanies by the little bastard pulling my chair out with me in it. He then proceeded to sit in my lap and run his hands through my hair. 

As if my indignation were not complete, the little prick did a back flip from my lap and landed facing me on that once great and honorable table.  With one quick thrust to the left and a flick of his wrist, the orange thong was no more.  By Merlin's mighty balls themselves – I've never seen such a sight.  And it was at this moment in my life I realized that I should never again refer to any leprechaun as "little prick".

The men's sniggers were now at full throttle and the women were beside themselves grappling for the leprechaun's attention. But no, he was there for me and me alone. 

The leprechaun cleared his throat and began:

I know myself a girl, her name is Hermione.

And when I'm ever around her, I'm as happy as can be!

Being around Mione is like drinking the elixir of life.

So won't you make me happy, and become by beautiful wife!

Love, Mr. Ronald S. Weasley

When he finished, he leaned in for a kiss, the Cheeky Bastard; but I quickly turned my head and presented my cheek instead. He picked up his pants and headed for the door.

My colleagues were wiping their eyes, some from romantic tears and others from mad laughter. 

I found myself waging an inner battle to not throw a scene right there and then. My pragmatic side eventually won and I walked out of the Hall with my head held high. However, not before "my prey" released a great guffaw. It was quick and to the point, but was designed to assure that I knew who had pulled that little stunt. As if Ron and I were ever romantically involved, the very thought sent shivers of disgust down my erect back. Ugh! 

Needless to say I was made quite the spectacle of and found myself repeating a million times that Ron and I were not involved and that the "incident" was a joke by a very _deranged_ person.

Unfortunately, my incident was still all the rage at dinner later on that evening and I had to sit there once again and endure it in a façade of pleasantness.  Severus, of course, was enjoying himself immensely. The man had the nerve to turn to me during dinner and ask if I had responded to Mr. Weasley, by chance. 

To make matters even worse, (I swear every time I think it cannot get worse…I get bitten by the "Yes, it can" bug.) someone had sent a note to Ron during the day and his response showed up right as Severus was returning his attention to dinner. You guessed it, a blasted HOWLER. 

In a booming, magnified voice, "Hermione Anne Granger it is polite to let someone know when you are going to use them in a Practical Joke! For Zeus' sake, Hermione, my girlfriend called me in tears after hearing about my "Proposal" in Hogsmeade. And by the way, I have more taste than to use a fuckin' bloody dancing leprechaun!  Twelve dancing dwarfs maybe, but a leprechaun?!  I thought you knew I had better taste than that."

At the last bit, Severus quietly snorted so that only I would hear. Unfortunately, I was not the only one to hear as we all were about to find out.  

Everyone else at the table sat in stunned silence, until Sirius screeched his chair back in a threatening manner and walked to stand behind Severus.

"I don't suppose you know anything about the singing and dancing leprechaun, Greaseball?" He growled.

Severus stood up and turned to face Sirius. He responded to him with a "Sit."

I saw the fury flash in Sirius' eyes with the thinly veiled dog reference. 

"You bloody wanker how you dare insult Hermione or me. You are nothing but a crook-nosed, smarmy git that doesn't know any better than to hurt the people around him."

At the "git" comment, Severus had pulled and pointed his wand at Sirius.

I went to intervene, but Dumbledore beat me to it. He stepped between the men and asked them both to return to their chambers for the evening. 

Argh! Remember what I said about men and their pissing contests? Before Sirius left, he winked at me and rubbed my shoulder in reassurance. As if I need anyone to fight my battles for me, I had been able to take care of myself for years; just ask Harry and Ron.

I would have gotten up and followed Severus out of the Hall, but I had some plotting to do. So, instead, I headed to the library for some light reading.

A/N: "I Wanna Sex You Up" was done by Color Me Badd. I don't own it in anyway…


	6. August 6, 2000

August 6, 2000

Well, I completed my research in the library and embarked on my next escapade with Severus. It took me about 3 hours in the library, but I left knowing that I was once again on top. I swear, when I finally get that exasperating man in my bed, I will make it very clear that I will be the one in control.

I sat about with my plans by using his "expertise" against him. I contacted Dumbledore and asked him if he would talk Severus into letting me have some research area in his dungeons. Dumbledore informed me later in the day that I had my area, and that I should see Severus to find out all the details. Damn the man and his knowing eyes, I swear he already knows what I am up to. No mind, I must get to work. My reputation IS at stake.

I waited until dinner and then asked Severus about my research area. His snort of disbelief was his only response. I had expected this. So, I pulled from my robes a file full of potion research I had done in college. It was very legitimate and was actually a good area for me to actually continue in (after my current "project" of course). He jerked the file from my hand, opened and did a quick perusal. 

His eyes met mine and I knew I had him. I told you it was legit. 

He nodded in approval and said for me to follow him to the dungeons after dinner. I returned his nod and turned to Sirius.

I conversed with Sirius through the rest of dinner; ignoring Severus completely. Once he was finished, he lightly prodded my arm and inquired if I was ready to venture to the dungeons. I made my excuses to Sirius and followed Severus out of the Great Hall.

We walked to the dungeons and past his private chambers. He had set up a private research area for me behind one of the numerous paintings. My password was "nymphomaniac." Bloody comic-want-to-be…

He ushered me into the rooms with a flourish of his arm, swished with a pivot around and walked back to his quarters. I went into my new lab and looked around. He had graced me with a twelve size pewter cauldron, a mini-collection of the most common potion ingredients, a wooden stool and several stirrers made of various metals and woods. He was even so kind as to start a fire for my use; I almost felt guilty for my devious actions. I said almost.

I set to work. I pulled out the book I had checked out form the library, "Ensnaring the Senses with Potions." Yes, you read that correctly. I bet you thought Severus was just the cleverest bloke of all time, didn't you? It seems he can read too.

I turned to page 1097 and found the potion I was going to use, "How to Brew a Pleasant Personality."

I needed 2 grams of Brown Confectioners Sugar, 4 grams of shaved Nifler hide, 10 grams of crushed Graham Crackers, 5 mL of Newt's Blood, 25 mL of boiled Dragon Pus, 25 mL of Fat Free Chocolate Syrup, and a nose hair of the person to be affected.

I was to combine the first three ingredients using a mortar and pestle. After they were sufficiently crushed, I needed to strain them through a cheese cloth. 

I then added the crushed and sifted mixture to the boiled Dragon Pus and Chocolate Syrup already in the cauldron; I heated the mixture to exactly 77 degrees Celsius and maintained the temperature for 4 hours. 

During that time, I had to get a nose hair from Severus. I selected the easy path first. I went to his chambers, knocked on his door and asked to use the bathroom. Once in there, I searched for nose clippers and any residual nose hairs, but it seems the man's bathroom is as meticulous as his potion's rooms.

So, I had to result to Plan B. Damn. 

Severus was sitting in a leather arm chair reading a huge tome by firelight. He was so absorbed in the work and never noticed me sneaking from behind. I wrapped my arms around him and kissed him on the cheek. As he reacted with a startled jerk, I deftly reached up, pretended to tweak his nose and grabbed a hair. 

Then, I retracted my arms. His response was an abrupt, "Is that the best you can do? I expected more from you."

I elegantly shrugged my shoulders and headed to the door. When I reached the door, Severus added to his previous comment.

"Hermione, there is only one potion in the world that requires nose hairs. Don't even think about it." 

I feigned ignorance, but inside I was seething. Bloody Man! 

I left his quarters headed back to my research room and continued with my plan, only I modified it just a bit.

I made cupcakes for the entire teaching staff. They were all alike save for one; I made Severus' with black icing instead of the standard blue.

Then, I made a trip to the kitchens and had a nice long talk with Winky and Dobby. Next, I went to Dumbledore, had a nice chat with tea and acquired his help as well.

The next night for dinner, I arrived early and sat a cupcake for everyone on their dessert plates. 

Severus was typically late and looked at the cupcake with immense amounts of distrust. He ate his dinner and asked Dumbledore where the cupcakes had come from. 

Dumbledore responded with a slight chuckle and informed him that I had made them for the teaching staff.

Severus snorted in the most superior and supercilious way. Then, he proceeded to push the cupcake as far from his person as possible.

I had to work very hard not to laugh out loud at his paranoid antics. I knew I had done the right thing when I purposely made his a different color just to play with his mind.

As the rest of the faculty finished their cupcakes, Dumbledore announced that there was going to be a small social gathering after dinner and everyone was required to attend. So, he asked everyone to go to their rooms and put on some casual muggle clothes to better enjoy the evening. 

Severus, under his breath, muttered, "Senile Ole' Bastard!" He stood and left the Great Hall.

I headed to my quarters and proceeded to change for the evening's event. I had already laid out my clothes and changed as quickly as possible. I wanted to be back to the soiree as soon as possible. I put on my mini-dress in black and red swirls. I added thigh-high boots, let my hair down (straightened) and put in silver hoop earrings the size of soccer balls. 

When I returned, Dumbledore and Flitwick had taken the time to decorate the Hall. The hall and several of the professors were now sporting a 70's theme. There was a dance floor that was flashing neon lights (think Saturday Night Fever), a bar with McGonagall acting as bartender (wearing a pheasant shirt and muggle, bell-bottom jeans, who new her ass was that firm?) and every other hyperbolized 70's item you can think of… Dumbledore was wearing a blue and yellow mingled button shirt that was unbuttoned and open to his waist. He also was sporting a large gold chain with a Celtic Knot pendent the size of a baseball! He had also turned his white mane into a white afro! The man was really too much at times! 

Everyone was taking the theme quite seriously and had dressed the part, even Severus. He arrived in black fitted dress pants and a shirt that matched Dumbledore's down to wearing it the same! Merlin's Robes, there was that sexy chest hair. I had to work very hard to keep my knees from buckling, but I succeeded.

Dumbledore started the music and several of the professors began dancing. Much to my amusement, they were doing the Hustle; and Madame Hooch was really getting down. It made me want to join in, but I needed to watch for the potion to kick in. Oh…that's right! I forgot to tell you! The potion was added to Severus' dinner by Dobby and Winky. It was never in the cupcake! I love my conniving mind, don't you? Pretty impressive if I have to say so myself.

Severus was sitting at one of the transfigured tables and scowling at anyone who looked his way. This went on for about 10 minutes, when he began tapping his foot to the beat of the music. Next, he added strumming his fingers on the table. His next change was humming; yes, he was humming to the music. Do you have the picture in your mind...a toe tapping, finger strumming and humming Severus? 

The next potion-induced change had all the teachers stopping in shock. Severus Snape had gotten up; he put a hand on his hip, put up a hand (pointing to the enchanted ceiling), and began swinging his hips to and fro while moving his arms.

I was ecstatic. It was working! 

I eagerly joined the dance floor, and moved quickly towards Severus. I placed myself directly in front of him and shook my hips in time with him and the music.

He smiled this huge grin that showed white teeth and all. (I know, I know…yes, he does have white teeth; and he really looks quite sexy when he grins!)

He shuffled closer and said, "Hey Babe! You are one funky chick! Wanna do the Bump?"

I nodded my agreement enthusiastically and turned to the left. He turned, as well, and began slinging his hips in time with mine. Bump, Bump, Bump! I was having the time of my life!

By now with Dumbledore's encouragement, the professors had resumed their own dancing. Everyone was getting down!

All the female professors (and some of the males) wanted to dance with the new and improved Potion Master! So, I graciously let him complete his social duties; then took him back to my side. 

The night continued as such until about midnight. One reason was it was getting late, but the other was that the potion was beginning to lose effect. In some ways, it was even more amusing. Severus would go through sentences that would emulate both his normal personality and the potion induced one. One fine example was "You are going to regret this Babycakes!" It was finished with a wink and a grin. I busted out laughing as did the rest of the room. 

I knew my time was about up, so I hastily left the Great Hall. I skipped all the way back to my quarters. What a wonderful night…

A/N: I do not own "Saturday Night Fever" in anyway… 


	7. August 7, 2000

August 7, 2000

I'm going to need all my strength and courage that befits a Gryffindor to get through this journal entry. Remember my last battle with "my prey?" You know… the personality changing potion that caused Severus to behave in a way he would hate…

Well, the real Severus is back in full force and has shaken me to the core. He has brought me to my knees and I want to beg him to take me. Forget wasting my energy on trivial tits and tats; I want to feel his hard body slamming into mine! NOW! 

Once again, I am getting ahead of myself. Let me revert back to this morning when I awoke and explain my day.

As usual, I awoke just as the sun was making its entrance into my chambers. I smiled to myself as I remembered the events from the night before. I stretched languorously and yawned. I knew that Severus would be in a foul and vengeful mood (worse than usual) and was mentally putting on my armor. I went to get my underclothes from my dresser when I noticed something lying on top that was not mine. 

There, sitting on my dresser, was a dildo; one of those dildos that looks like the real thing. You know the ones I am talking about, accurate down to the bumpy veins. I could not stop staring at it. It was huge. It was about 8 ½ inches long and 2 inches in diameter. Dear God! What was I going to do with that?  That was when I noticed a piece of paper taped to the mirror above the dresser. It was folded into quarters. 

I gingerly removed the paper from the mirror. I remembered my one incident with buberpus poison in my fourth year. It was not to be taken lightly. There appeared to be no issues with the paper, so I carefully opened it. This is what I found:

Miss Granger-

I have taken the liberty of helping you with your rampant hormones. Since you seem so determined to have relations, I have created for you a new and improved wand. The vibrator on your dresser is, in fact, your wand. It also happens to be a likeness of me, inch for inch. Enjoy. It is the only way you will ever "have" me. 

Severus

I swallowed visibly and placed the note on the dresser by the vibrator. I had a very bad feeling about this.

I slowly picked up the vibrator and was determined to verify that it was indeed my wand. I called out, "Accio hairbrush."

The item in my hand began humming loudly, moving back and forth in my hand and then shot forth a bright, white light. The hairbrush flew into my other hand. Dear Merlin, the vibrator had just mimicked the real thing!

Oh no! I was supposed to spend the morning helping several of the professors put wards up around the school. My mind quickly sought for an answer of what I should do. I could feign illness, but what if the spell did not wear off. How long could I pretend to be sick? I could go to Dumbledore, but then I would have to show him. How mortifying would that be? Furthermore, he would probably find the entire situation just and deserved.  He had helped me with my plan against Severus, so he would most likely refuse to undo Severus' response. What about Minerva? True, it would mean that I would have to fill her in on my plan; but surely, it would be easier than when I told Harry and Ron.

So, off I went to speak to Minerva before breakfast. I got to her rooms and lightly knocked. It was a few seconds later that the landscape painting swung open and revealed the professor.

She greeted me with a smile and asked if I wanted to come in. I assured her that I did and that I needed to talk to her about something fairly important. She ushered me in offered me a seat. 

Then, I told her. Her eyes were as big as saucers when I had finished my explanations. She blinked several times and then asked to see my wand. I showed it to her and she could contain it no longer. She began giggling hysterically. It took her several minutes to calm down. 

Once she had herself back under control, I asked her if she could check the wand for the type of spell placed on it. She retrieved her wand from her robes and set about to the task. She deftly waved her wand around mine several times, made several thoughtful murmurs and then turned back to me.

She informed that while Severus liked to pretend he had no use for "foolish wand waving;" he was actually quite good at it. She then informed me that this was one of the better spells she had ever seen. He had transfigured my wand and added several wards to keep the item as is for a couple of days. The only way to undo the spell before the end of the second day was for Severus to stop it. Like that was going to ever happen…

I thanked her for her time and help. She patted me on the back in a motherly fashion and told me that the two days would be over before I knew it. I told her that may be true, but it would not be over before everyone else had seen it. She murmured a few comforting words and saw me to the door.

I was really worried about this. How in the world was I going to get through this? I was pondering this intensely as I walked down to the Great Hall.

A lot of the professors were already there and I took my normal seat; there was no way I was going to show fear to Severus. I called for my breakfast and waited. 

About 10 minutes later, Severus swept in with his usual flair. He ignored me as usual and I found myself, for once, ignoring him too.

I spoke to Sirius for a while, but mostly I sat quietly and ate my breakfast. 

Severus got up to leave the hall, but before he did; he quietly asked in my ear if I liked his "wand."

He then left me to my fate.

Dumbledore, as soon as he finished his breakfast, asked Flitwick, McGonagall, Sirius and myself to help him put up the new wards. I grudgingly got to my feet and headed for the entrance hall with everyone else. 

It gets worse. Dumbledore put us into pairs (apparently, he and Severus had already paired themselves together). I got paired with Sirius. Yes, Sirius.

We walked outside and Sirius and I took our places. He pulled out his wand and I did too. Sirius was about to begin his ward spell when he happened to glance my way. He did a double take and then stared. His eyes were bulging out of his head.

"Umm- Hermione, I think you grabbed the wrong –umm- wand when you left your room this morning."

"No Sirius, I did not. Someone thought that transfiguring my wand to look like this would be a funny practical joke."

"That's your wand?"

"Yes"

He lost it. He doubled over in laughter and tears. He was consumed with laughter for so long; everyone came over (sans Dumbledore and Severus) to see what was wrong. Soon, they all were hooting in laughter (even McGonagall). Traitor…

She then makes it worse by telling them to ask me to do some magic. And to think, I once looked to this woman as a mother figure.

Sirius took the hint and requested that I do some magic for them.

I shook my head in a negative manner, but he insisted.

I was browbeaten. I finally agreed. I performed a simple levitation spell.

I'll save myself the torture of reliving the wand focusing my magical energy and just move on to the reactions.

Sirius fell over and literally rolled in the grass. Flitwick also fell over and kicked his small legs to and fro in the air.

McGonagall had known what to expect so she was merely wiping the tears from her eyes. 

Keep in mind this is all BEFORE lunch. I have much more to tell, but I need to take a mental break. I'll finish my day from Hades tomorrow. Good night. 


	8. August 8, 2000

August 8, 2000

As I promised, I will continue telling you about my day from Hades; or as the calendar calls it, August 6, 2000. You will recall that when I last left you, several of the professors had seen my wand's new look – which after all, being "inch for inch" accurate, makes me want to finish my conquests all that much more urgently! 

Anyway, once my fellow professors regained their composure, we got back to the task of getting the new wards completed. Although, every time it was my turn to start or enhance a ward; Sirius would start grinning. I swear if he keeps this up, I might be joined to start coming up with some dog jokes on my own.

The final ward was a strength based ward and required all of us to stand in a circle point our wands upwards and chant the charm over and over. In the circle, guess who was across from me? Yes, you guessed it, Severus. It took about 30 minutes for the ward to take effect. Of course, my wand would dutifully spurt and sputter in magic throws at least once a minute. If only a real man could have such staying power!

It was finally time for lunch by the time we had created all the wards. I was talking to Professor Flitwick and heading for the Great Hall; which is why I never saw the hex coming (Oh gods that was NOT intended to be a pun. I swear!). You know that funny feeling you get when someone hexes you? Well I felt it, and I didn't have to think twice about whom had done it. So, I took a deep breath and waited to see what the fates had in store for me. 

Dumbledore, just as we got to the large oak doors to the entrance, joined our conversation. He helped open the door with a chivalrous flair. I, in my well taught way, thanked him and placed a hand on his arm. Evidently, I thanked the poor man more than I had intended. 

The man began writhing as if in pain and moaning in the most conspicuous way. He grabbed hold of the door and began humping it like a bitch in heat. He started yelling "yes, right there" over and over and over. 

It was most embarrassing. I was wondering what in the world had happened. Apparently, so were the other professors; because Sirius quickly pulled me away to check on Dumbledore. 

Instantaneously, he, too, was in the throws of what seemed to be passion. He fell to the ground and writhed around; these movements were marked by random hip thrusts and howls (yes, like a dog). 

At this, I heard a loud guffaw. The very same guffaw I heard when Larry the Leprechaun visited. My heart stopped in horror. It could not be ME causing these behaviors in others. Holy Hades! 

I had to test my theory. Since I was still rather put out with Minerva, I decided to use her as my test subject. As she yelled for Flitwick to summon Pomfrey, I touched her on the arm. She began squealing like a pig. You know that high pitched squeal a piglet makes when you pick it up! Her hands were running up and down her body and then began pulling her hair out of her neatly coifed bun. Her knees buckled and soon she too was writhing on the ground. Oh Hades! I WAS the one causing them to react that way. 

As I came out of my realization and shock, Pomfrey arrived and took a look at the victims. She got the most peculiar look on her face and asked if any of us had been hexed lately. I slowly raised my hand. Pomfrey quickly walked over to me and quickly tapped me on my nose with the tip of her finger. A smile appeared on her face and she cried out, "Yip! Yip! Yip! Thanks I needed that!" She then asked me if I knew what the Touch of Ecstasy Spell was. I shook my head in the affirmative.

The Touch of Ecstasy spell is a spell that can be best described as the Midas Touch of Orgasms. When a person comes in contact with a person hexed with the spell, they writhe in ecstasy until they reach three orgasms. That is the only way to break the spell. As for the person hexed, they are active for 24 hours. 

Pomfrey conjured three charmed trolleys, placed the victims on them and with a flick of the wrist sent them to the infirmary. 

With that done, Pomfrey suggested that I continue on to lunch with Flitwick and Severus. She also suggested that I not to touch anyone. (No shit, Sherlock!) 

That said, Flitwick took a step back from me and ushered me into the castle. Severus followed Flitwick's actions and also gestured for me to enter first. So, I opened the door and moved through taking great care not to touch anyone. Severus and Flitwick followed at a safe distance. We entered the Great Hall and found all the other professors already there. I went to sit in my regular spot, but Severus told me to wait. 

He then filled the rest of the staff in on my predicament (Miserable Bastard!) and suggested that I be asked to eat at one of the student's tables. All the other professors, not wanting to be in the throes of passion apparently (prudes), agreed with Severus. I was banished to a student's table. 

I ate in silence obviously, as there was no one for me to talk too. I was still close enough to hear the conversation at the staff table. Needless to say, it was heavily centered on my recent predicament. I kept myself sane with thoughts of bringing Severus to his knees. 

Severus ate quickly, but with such grace. He seems to get pleasure knowing that once again he was superior to me both in the skill of his hexes and in the knowledge I was once again a child sitting in front of him at the student's tables. As usual, he did not stay to converse with anyone and soon left the Hall. 

However, it seems that Severus was still upset over the potion from the night before; because, as he was leaving the Hall, he conjured Peeves, the school's poltergeist, and sent him on a mission during the rest of our lunch. 

There I was, eating lunch and minding my own business (in banishment, no less!), when Peeves came swooping by. He cackled evilly as he took a steep dive and landed in my soup. He splashed it all over me, but that was not the worst of it. No, he had to come around and try to fly through me. Okay, he DID fly through me. However, it seems that the Touch of Ecstasy spell is not indifferent to ghosts and poltergeists; nope, definitely not. Before I could bat my eyelashes, Peeves was screaming "Boogety Boogety Boo" over and over. He began to shake uncontrollably and green ectoplasm was splattering everywhere. 

All the other Hogwart's ghosts came to see what all the commotion was about. Do you know how embarrassing it is for ghosts to be discussing your orgasmic abilities? No, well keep it that way. 

I hastily left the Great Hall and prayed for the day to be over soon, so I could commence with my revenge. 


	9. August 8, 2000 Part 2

August 8, 2000 (Part Two)

I went back to my quarters that afternoon and researched. I am going to bring Snape to his knees, he will beg me to give him release and then I will make him wait some more. And I have created the perfect plan to accomplish this. However, I must first finish the day from Hades. Remember, all this occurred back on August 6.

So, I spent my afternoon in seclusion and silence. I even planned to skip dinner, but I received a floo message from Dumbledore telling me that my presence was required at dinner. I guess that means he had his three orgasms. Merlin, I cannot believe I thought that, let alone wrote it down! 

Anyway, I now find myself heading to the Great Hall for dinner. I have not come in contact with anyone thus far, and I begin to wonder if I am avoiding people or if they are avoiding me. 

When I arrive in the dining hall, everyone else is already there, even Severus. I find that I am still banished to the student's table and I quickly take my seat. Dumbledore asks me how I am doing. I respond that I am fine. I return the question to him. He responds that he had an outstanding afternoon, one that he has not experienced in these many years. I feel my cheeks turning red and I quickly turn to my dinner. 

I once again eat my dinner in silence and prefer to listen to the conversations around me.  I hear Dumbledore and Minerva discussing how long it took them to release the hex on them. So, not what I needed to hear. Apparently, Dumbledore took an hour, while Minerva took 3 hours. Minerva then began explaining that she figured she should enjoy it while she could. At this, I told my mind to stop the images and for my ears to stop listening.

As usual, owl mail arrived at precisely 6:15! Typically, there are only a few owls when the students are not here, but tonight there are over 50 owls flying around the Great Hall. The owls dropped several letters and packages to Dumbledore, but the majority of the owls were flying in a circle over my head.  A large, grey owl dropped a letter in my plate. I flipped it over and saw the crest of Hogsmeade's local Apothecary, so I opened it. Inside was an invoice of my recent purchases, only I had not been to the Apothecary in weeks. I quickly perused the invoice. 

A deep foreboding feeling was building in my stomach. It was confirmed with the drop of a package, a large, multi-pack box of tampons. My face is scarlet, completely on fire.  I guess Severus was still pissed about the night before, because he was determined to have me on my knees. But no matter how red my face may get, I will not crack. I reach for the box of tampons and move them to the chair beside me. 

I no more move the box off of my plate than another package arrives. This time, I am the proud recipient of a tube of yeast infection crème. I will not crack. I will not crack. I will not crack.

The crème is followed by several brightly colored bras falling through the air. The matching panties are next. They fall on the table all around me. By now, Sirius is having a serious coughing fit. I guess he thinks no one can hear the laughter underneath all that coughing. Imbecile! Minerva asks me if everything is okay. I respond that I simply picked some things up in Hogsmeade and decided to have them delivered. Her face tells me that she does not believe me, but I smile at her again and she nods in acquiescence.  

The next three owls bestow me with a collection of feminine deodorant spray. At least I'll smell good, no?

The box that followed was the Piece de Resistance! Two owls flew by carrying an open box. They gracefully flew back around and dumped the contents on me. Now, I was covered in condoms. Yes, I was adorned in fluorescent colored condoms that had been charmed to play "I'm a Slave for You." Yep, you know what is coming next…

I am also, now, the proud owner of a concubine costume. It floated through the air with such grace. Too bad, the owls draped it over my head. This was followed by jewelry to complete the ensemble. Apparently, the Potions Master has a control issue too. 

I will not fail. I will not fail. I will come out on top. I will come out on top.

As I came out of my self-induced pep rally, I find Dumbledore on the floor laughing. Sirius had tears streaming down his face he was laughing so hard. He somehow regained enough composure to ask me if I was becoming sexually repressed; and if I was, would I consider him as a possible outlet. All the men, sans Severus, laughed at this. The women shook their heads in disgust. For once, I was receiving "Girl Power" help; they understood it was so like a man to take advantage of such a strenuous situation. 

Seeing my distress, Madame Hooch, Minerva, and Professor Sprout came down to my table. They kept their distance (I WAS still orgasmically active), but told me that they would make sure the items got to my room tonight. And, that it might be best if I finished dinner in my rooms.  I said that Dumbledore had said attendance to dinner tonight was required. 

Minerva gave a great huff at this and turned to Dumbledore. He was no longer laughing. In fact, one might say he had a guilty look on his face. Minerva turned back to me, rolled her eyes then closed them and muttered what sounded to be "that's what I thought." However, she recovered quickly and looked at me with what can only be described as clear insight. Oh gods! Dumbledore had requested me to be here on behalf of Severus'. It all made sense now. 

I could not be upset with Dumbledore. He was merely keeping the peace by helping us both. However, Severus was another story all together. It was time to take off the gloves and fight dirty. 

Minerva and the other women must have noticed the glint of determination in my eyes because they smiled at me. Not a regular smile; no, one of those smiles that you know was caused by a very, evil thought. 

"Hermione," Minerva said, "We will personally make sure that these items are brought to your room by, say, 9pm tonight."

I responded with a grin and a wink. I left the hall.

I think you know what happened at 9pm that evening. My quarters were taken over by a female SWAT team. Plans were discussed, decided upon and now, I am sitting here waiting to make my move. Tomorrow, I retaliate. 


	10. August 9, 2000

August 9, 2000

The day has dawned and it is time for my revenge. I awake with a wonderful feeling that only the thought of justice can bring. 

The night before, several teachers (Hooch, McGonagall and Sprout) had gathered in my room for a battle strategy meeting. Of course, this required me to tell them how this all started; but to my shock, they were quite receptive to Severus "getting some." By the way, those are Professor Sprout's words, not mine. Didn't know she had it in her; but apparently, (according to McGonagall anyway) she is quite the wild women...maybe one too many mushrooms or something?

Anyway, they all unanimously agreed that Severus "getting some" could only help him; so, I had/have their full cooperation. It was then decided that we would also help teach Severus a little lesson. Oh all right, we were going to teach him a BIG lesson. We each settled on the part we would play, and we decided to act. Today is the day. 

I traveled my usual path to breakfast. I took my time enjoying the scenery. I planned on enjoying this day to the fullest, stopping to smell the roses if you will. What a glorious day... 

Before I knew it, I was singing "Zippy Dee Doo Daa." Had anyone came across me, they would have thought Dumbledore and I had exchanged places. You know what I mean. People questioning whether he is mentally challenged and all.

I reached the Great Hall and threw open the doors with a flourish. I stopped, took a deep breath and entered with a smile. I practically skipped to my place at the table. 

Severus was already sitting in his normal place and eating his morning meal. He did not look up as I brushed by him. 

I, on the other hand, sang a good morning to him. He sneered. I smiled. The morning was even more perfect than before.

Minerva caught my eye and gave me a sly wink. All the other women also offered a slight wink in greeting and I reciprocated. It was amazing the power that sisterhood offers. 

I ignored Severus. I spoke with Sirius and Dumbledore during my meal. I did keep a close watch on Severus because phase one was to acquire his help with something. 

I saw him begin to leave out of the corner of my right eye. 

"Severus?"

"Yes…"

"Could we meet this afternoon? I have some teaching methods I would like to run by you and Professor McGonagall."

"I see no need. You know my style and you know my feelings on the matter."

I must have had a panicked look on my face because McGonagall and Dumbledore went to intercede.

"Severus, you know our policy. It is in our interests to help our fellow colleagues." Dumbledore stated. 

"2pm. Do not be late." Severus was gone with an impatient swish. 

I looked to Minerva and she smiled a bright, knowing smile. Life was truly great. 

It was 10am, so we had a few hours to kill before we implemented the plan. I met up with the ladies outside of the Great Hall and we agreed we needed to get out and calm our nerves. So, we took a short trip to Hogsmeade and walked around the town. We ended in Rosmerta's to have a calming butterbeer. We leisurely enjoyed the drink and then headed back to complete our preparations. 

I arrived in my room and collected my toys (remember those I bought when Harry was visiting?). I also dressed myself in the concubine outfit. I put my long hair up in an "I love Jeannie" ponytail. I covered my eyelids in a shimmering gold. I dressed my eyelashes in a thick black mascara that "separated and lifted." I ended my eye makeup with a deep brown eyeliner on both lids. I put a soft coffee blush on my cheeks and ended with a bronze lipstick.

I looked good and I knew it. I covered my costume with full robes.

I put a shrinking charm on my "goodies" and headed to the entrance hall. There, I met up with my cohorts. They, too, were dressed as I. It was time. 

I placed a "Do not notice" charm on McGonagall, Hooch and Sprout. Then, we headed down to the dungeons. 

It was exactly 1:59:57. I knocked on his classroom door. He replied with a curt, "Enter."

He greeted me with a "You are early." 

I replied with an "I'm not now." He gestured for me to sit down in one of the student's chairs. I nodded my head and began to remove my outer robe. To stay the surprise, I turned my front away from his sharp gaze; plus, I could now see my fellow warriors. I slightly smiled at them and removed my robe. Severus was not looking at me. His nose was back in his current book. I waited for him to notice me. After a few minutes, he gazed up at me with a "Why are you not…" But, he never finished his statement. *giggle*

I told you I looked good. Apparently, he agreed. He quickly removed the shock from his face and replaced it with a harsh stoic look.

He began again with "What is the meaning of this?" 

However, Professor McGonagall had already placed an invisible restraining ward on Severus. It locked him to the chair. He immediately began fighting the restraint and insisted that I tell him what I thought I was doing.

I informed him that I was taking what I had decided was mine. If I could suffer through all of his recent tortures, I feel justified in returning the favor to him. I pulled my wand from my harem costume's sleeve and removed the charm from my Ladies in Battle. I also undid my shrinking charm. 

I had charmed a muggle CD player to play some music for us. With a flick of her wand, Sprout had placed a video camera in the corner. The reason is for later reasons just remember his restraints ARE invisible!

As soon as the camera is started, I began the CD player. All four of us surrounded Severus and began belly dancing. We were up close and personal. Our hips and bodies were gyrating on every side of him. We varied our shakes to match the music; some slow and enticing, while others were fast and impatient. We rolled from side to side. We rolled front to back. We touched his sides, his back. 

Professor Sprout even jumped on his lap and wiggled around. With horny ol' Sprout getting into the grove, Minerva let go too. The next thing we knew, she had both her hands in his hair running them through over and over. 

Madame Hooch had taken to erotically rubbing her backside into his back; I guess you could call it a butt massage. That is really all I can think to call it. She shook that rump in round circles again and again. I stood in front, maintained eye contact; and gyrated my hips in the most evocative way that I knew. I saw his eyes drifting over my body and I felt my nipples harden and my stomach tighten in need. He was only making this easier for me. The song changed and we all traded places. I sat in Severus' lap, Sprout played with his hair, McGonagall massaged his back with her firm arse and Madame Hooch was practicing her stomach rolls. They were really quite amazing. 

As I was dancing on Severus' lap, I noticed that he was really *enjoying* our exhibition. I gave the specified signal, two snaps and a clap. We all stopped our actions and stood in front of Severus. 

"Do you give?"

"No" His denial was enhanced with a curt snort

"So be it."

I placed a women's sleeping patch over his eyes. He was now unable to see what we were doing. We resumed our tasks only now every possible body part was being rubbed against Severus, up and down, front and back, and round and round; we erotically threw our bodies at the Potions Master. Next, I transfigured his robes to be a Speedo. You know the ones that emphasize everything he "has." The color was the richest red I could imagine. I guess I should say…think candy apple red.

Madame Hooch picked up his right hand and began suckling on his fingers. She treated each one to light suck, ran her tongue up and down the length and then gave some well placed nips. He liked it, a lot.

McGonagall took the other hand and gave it equal attention. Her tongue was flicking everywhere. 

Professor Sprout lovingly sucked on his left ear. She nipped and blew. To our delight, Severus moaned. 

I kept on grinding my hips in his lap. I rotated them to the right. Then, back to the left. I rubbed my rump up and down on his chest. I heard him inhaling my scent. 

He was becoming very aroused. 

I gave the signal again, and we all stood before him.

"Do you give?"

"No"

"So be it"

I transfigured a quill lying on his desk into a razor. While the other women were belly dancing on his front side, I shaved his head from the back. I did not stop until he was bald. Once I finished, I took a long, slow, sensual lick of his head. He lowered his head as I did this; so, I followed by flicking my tongue several times on the back of his neck and lightly blowing. I saw him shiver from the contact. I grinned. I knew I was getting to him. 

I gave the signal again and the ladies stopped grinding their bodies into his.

"Do you give?"

"No"

"So be it."

I made it so that he could see out of his right eye. I flicked my wand at the door and it unlocked. In walked two cross dressers. They both were wearing concubine outfits, well made faces and stiletto heels. They closed the door behind them and greeted Severus with a deep, growling "Hi!" This was followed by their heels clicking on the floor as they moved further into the room.

The Ladies and I walked away from Snape and stopped in front of the new arrivals. I told them he had been a very bad boy. They told me they understood and pulled out chains and whips. 

I told them to come and find me once he had been suitably punished. I gave them a knowing wink. We walked out of the room and I waited in the halls. The women had done their part superbly. 

I could hear the clanking of chains, but I knew he was not being hurt; nor was the men in their cross dressing outfits. They were actually two friends from college who owed me big time after helping them pass one of their more trying classes. 

The deal was to swat the floor around Severus with the chains and leather whips. They were not to touch, but to strike close enough for him to feel the swish of the air. 

I listened for the specified 50 lashes and I sauntered back in. My two college friends were standing to the side lightly swinging their torture devices. 

I walked up to Severus and ran my finger tip down his chest. I lightly cuffed him under the chin and asked, "Do you give?"

"No"

"So be it."

I readjusted his patch to cover both eyes. I motioned for my friends to leave with a quick wave and a wink. I was all alone with Severus.

I placed my face as close to his as I could without touching. Our breath intermingled, he smelled of cinnamon; mine smelled of sweet, juicy peaches. I took one last sensual inhale, and I lightly placed my lips on his. He responded and tried to deepen the kiss, but I pulled back.

"AH, AH, AH" I finished the chastise by tapping his nose with my finger.

I then caught his bottom lip and tugged, hard. After one more tug, I bit. A nice playful nip, that made him want to deepen the kiss. I once again removed my lips from his and moved back. I leaned into him again and bit his neck. I left teeth marks. I nipped a few more times and then I lightly trailed my tongue down his neck. He moved his head to make his neck more accessible. I got to the spot just over the clavicle and sucked. I licked my way back up to his ears and ran my tongue up the backside of his ear.

It was more than Severus could take. He moaned and it was deep and feral. It was an animalistic sound that awakened every single feminine nerve in my already aroused body. I stifled my replying moan. I could not lose control…yet.

"Do you give?"

He moaned out a "No!"

"So be it."

My lips traveled south again and came into contact with a nipple. I sucked it to a stiff peak, and then I lightly ran my teeth over it. You could see the aroused nipple, with my teeth on it, was causing him a mixture of pain and pleasure. I grinned evilly and moved to the other nipple. I repeated my actions and loved his responding twitch in his pants. 

"Do you give?"

"No"

"So be it"

I continued licking, nipping and biting every inch of his chest; up and down, left to right and then right to left, leaving no skin untouched. Simultaneously, I ran my right hand up his thigh and massaged his inner thigh. 

Severus was beginning to writhe in the chair. I continued both ministrations for several more minutes. He was quickly losing control.

"Do you give?"

"Yes, Merlin, Yes"

"Good"

I continued my teasing tactics. I wanted to hear the man beg as if I was the water he needed after being without for a month in the desert. 

His head was thrown back in the most deliciously capricious way, turning it from side to side. His body was screaming for release. It was time to ask…

"Will you beg?"

"Please…more…now" he barely gasped out in a deep grating murmur.

"Now?"

"Yes damnit…now" This was hissed through clenched teeth.

"Finite Incatatem" I whispered. Severus was now free. He wrapped an arm around me, threw his book on the floor, and shoved me onto his desk. He freed me of my pantaloons and him of his Speedos. Within an eighth of a second, we were one. He pushed me forcefully into the desk and made me his; over and over, until I could not maintain a logical thought. I was lost in the sensations. My body was alive, receiving and screaming for more.

I got out "more." It was strangled and passion filled, but he heard. 

He changed his position and quickened his stride. I could feel the tingling sensation begin in my core and burst from me at the speed of a muggle bullet. My walls grasping around him caused him to follow quickly after I. 

He dropped his head onto my chest while trying to catch his breath. I rubbed my hands over his head. 

Once he garnered control, he spoke. "This is war"

I responded, "I certainly hope so."


	11. May 1, 2003

May 1, 2003

I have surrendered…to love. Severus and I are to be married this afternoon.  I'd say we both won. But, who's ever heard of a mutual surrender or both sides winning? I have not. So, I have one last surprise for my Severus. I have made my lipstick a portkey. When he kisses me at the end of the ceremony, we will be swept away to the moon. I have always wanted to meet the man in the moon; well, that, and we REALLY have a fondness for that weightless potion. Gravity sucks! 

For the last time, 

Hermione GRANGER

~ FIN ~


End file.
